The live post sold Stripe-before-IPO. Retail cannot buy that product on institutional terms. True private equity is an unregistered fund (typically 10+ years), limited to accredited investors and qualified clients (Investor.gov). Flagship 3(c)(7) funds require a qualified purchaser: $5 million in investments, not the house. Accredited status (Rule 501: $200k income / $1M ex-residence net worth, or Series 7/65/82) only opens 506(b)/(c) placements and most secondaries.
What retail can buy: Regulation Crowdfunding (issuer cap $5 million; non-accredited 12-month limit the greater of $2,500 or 5% if income or net worth is under $124,000, else 10% capped at $124,000); interval funds (Rule 23c-3: 5–25% of shares every 3/6/12 months at NAV, pro rata if oversubscribed); tender funds with discretionary windows; and accredited secondaries (Forge: typically 2–4% buyer fee, ~$5,000 fund / ~$100,000 direct, 45–60 days, company ROFR).
A 1.25% wrapper (BXPE Class I-Series I, 8-K 1 Jan 2026) versus VTI at 0.03%, plus lockups Bengen never modeled, is why this is usually the wrong first FIRE sleeve. Write core % versus satellite % before any order. 0% is complete. Then run RiskOptimizer and Target FIRE on earlyfire.quest.
17 CFR 230.501(a)(5)/(a)(6); SEC IA-6961; 15 U.S.C. 80a-2(a)(51). Income and net-worth tests are alternative accredited paths, not stacked.